Old Flames & E-mail Etiquette

A concerned site visitor writes:

To make a long story short, an old boyfriend found me on the Internet. He is married but not happily (so he says), I am widowed. He arranged for me to meet him at a resort, paying for everything including my airfare. We parted only to get deeply involved with each other after 40+ years. Now for 2 weeks I have not heard from him and am wondering what to do. Emails are going unanswered. In one of his emails, he had his neighbors email address and now I wonder if it would be appropriate to email them and ask about him. They do not know of our involvement and I plan to keep it that way. It's the not knowing that is making me feel sad as if a member of my family has died. Please advise if it's proper netiquette to contact these neighbors?

Yikes.... This really isn't about e-mail etiquette, it's more about having discretion and using common sense. As an adult that's the risk you took getting involved with a married man--regardless of how unhappy (so he says) he is.

No it is not appropriate to contact the neighbors. They did not give you their e-mail address to get involved in your affair and that's what you would be doing. This is your situation to resolve in another way. The fact he is using another person's address is a big red flag!

Regardless of the emotions involved, until he is a free man consider your trip one of life's adventures (or mistakes) that you now have to leave behind you. Chalk this one up to experience!